I never felt this way, I felt that if I had sneezed I was going to throw confetti, sparks, hearts and paper airplanes everywhere. I was with those kinds of nerves when your first kiss or when you get on a plane for the first time and you don’t know what you’ll feel when you’re in the air, like when you go to see someone you love and you have not seen in a long time! full of love and nerves, yes, but different nerves! Full of tenderness! That’s how I felt the day we met Judah.
Today 6 months ago we met him face to face… our little boy Judah Oak.
The birth plan.
The first thing that everyone says or asks now, or at least that’s what I read in all the books. Well, our plan was a 100% natural birth, without an epidural, in water and only with my husband and mother in the delivery room.
Thursday, January 4th.
As of this date, I had a week to complete 42 weeks of pregnancy, that is, it was already a week after we expected Judah. My parents were with us already in England, ready and waiting for this baby just like us. I tried to do anything, we walked, we used the technique of the ball, I tried to be in motion to make the baby arrive and I also rested but the day arrived and the doctor recommended inducing me. It was that Thursday, January 4 where Josh and I went to the hospital, we were calm but also a little nervous because we didn’t know what the process would be like. We were going to be parents!!! We just knew we wanted to meet Judah.
We waited in a special area where they put me a belt to check the heartbeats of the baby and in case I had contractions. I think I was ready to feel some pain because my pregnancy was very calm, I did not suffer from vomiting, dizziness, crazy cravings or anything that all pregnant ladies say they suffer normally. Then, I had no idea what a contraction could be and the truth was that I wanted to start!
I arrived at the hospital and after waiting a few hours we continued, the doctor induced me so that I could begin my work and wait for those contractions all mums talk about. Well, they induced me with some hormones by means of a gel called “Prostaglandins” that apparently helped to dilate the cervix and consequently to start into labor since I was only had 3cm of dilation and they could not do anything about it.
Once I got those hormones my body started to get very cold !! So much so that I started shaking uncontrollably !! After going to the bathroom I told a nurse and I got to my bed, Josh was next to me and I just started to shake without stopping, then the nurses came to see me and told me that my body had reacted to those hormones and I also had gotten a high temperature.
This part I was frustrated because I was so so cold and they asked me to open the windows and uncovered my body!!! But it helped. I was stabilized. A few minutes after I was ok I began to feel some pains that I do not know how to explain them! They were very intense! Contractions began!!! But the contractions were like the main labor now in its point! I remember that the nurses came to check my contractions (which were very high or intense and the beats of my baby) Judah was very well and apparently was calm, resting and without a sign of intent to try to go out into the world. While I was enduring the intensity of contractions every 1.5 – 2 minutes. Apparently, my body reacted too quickly to those hormones, so I only had to wait for Judah to be ready to go out and for my cervix to dilate a little bit more. All that began at 4:30 pm.
I did not remember how many hours I had to keep waiting and breathing in a way to help me not lose all my energy, to handle the intense pain I had before entering labor. I remembered to speak to myself internally and to Judah so that we could work as a team and that we could finish that one for all! I could not believe I was already there!!! And I was so close to meeting Judah!! Did I shout?? No, I did not scream, but it was like an intense sound that I think every woman finds at that moment to help us handle the pain. It is inexplicable and yes, beautiful!
As there were other girls there in the place where I was waiting and my contractions did not give me space to rest plus obviously my sounds!! They put me in a wheelchair because also I was apparently more dilated and I was going to wait in another room to give birth… I remember that while they were taking me there (I felt that the world did not exist) I could not wait to meet Judah and bring him to my arms!!!!
I heard say in the distance … – not yet… cannot enter to that room if she hasn’t broken waters – and I was in pain and in the wheelchair, I do not remember why I got up or how it happened but just at that moment, it happened!! like in the movies :/ my water broke and it meant that Judah was ready to leave now! – The doctor and nurses took me to a quiet, dark private room, and they were like angels to me!!! The pains began to get more intense than the ones I had already experienced. I was already a little tired, it was a late night at that point.
While I was there, once I went into labor, my mom came with us into the room, Josh was already with me from the beginning. My mum was a bit nervous I think because I only saw her quiet and praying. Something funny, once I was in that room in one of those contractions, my dad came into the room and he approached me telling me – You are doing very good! we are proud of you Maha! …I think he kept talking and leaving but I couldn’t listen I was so focused on Judah and what I was feeling! LOL !! Now I laugh 😛
The pain was strong! A little bit of water in between helped and an apple that my mom brought from the coffee shop. The pain was intense! Each time a contraction came I was tightening Josh’s hand and always I listened to my mother aside, saying that I was doing very well …
… Suddenly they offered me the epidural to help with the pain, but I didn’t accept it, I accepted the option of an injection of morphine and the gas-air – oxygen. It did not take away the pain but it helped me to have a space between contractions and to be able to breathe and “push” when the time came. 😛
Well, the time arrived, there were 30 minutes left until 12 a.m. and it would be the 5th of January. But Judah decided to be born on January 4 at 11:45 p.m. When he was born, Josh cut the umbilical cord. The nurses put a Judah on my chest, I only saw his big eyes watching the place where he was born … it made us nervous because they took it away from my chest and suddenly a cabinet of doctors entered the room and began to check Judah, all right, they said.
Judah didn’t cry because the morphine also relaxed him. They gave him quick oxygen and well, it was all good again. (that happened in a matter of seconds) and again I had my baby in my arms, skin to skin! Everything was calm, and tenderness! I felt a huge responsibility and unconditional love that filled the room at that moment!
And so it was how we met Judah for the first time, we cuddle the three of us and Josh and I observed Judah and we looked surprised at this amazing miracle!
That day and night shone, my heart grew bigger, my eyes opened like another world and I thank God for the health of Judah and our family! Being a mother is a responsibility, it is a gift but at the same time, it is courageous. Becoming a mom is a blessing!
Oh how I love you Judah xx